Grow Hair

I can’t grow hair on top of my head any more, but it will grow 6 inches overnight from a place on my face that never grew hair before!

Merry Christmas!

Not to offend anyone, but I would like to take a moment to wish everyone a very Merry Christmas. Yes, it is a “Happy Holiday” and a good time to wish someone a “Joyful Season’s Greeting”. Socially, we may be forced at times to be more politically correct in the way we present our intensions towards this wonderful time of year. We are even taught to hold back our true expressions and beliefs. Personally I think it is all just a load of crap. It’s about time we all stood for what we believed in and if that includes giving Christmas back to Christ then so be it. After all it is his birthday.
So once again,
Merry Christmas!

Doing Good

Doing something good for others will return a greater reward than if you had done it for yourself.


Venison is a VERY expensive meat.... after you add up the cost of the License, Gun, Ammo, Bait Pile, Flashlight, Stool, Blind, Coat, Boots, Gloves, GPS, Trail Cam, ATV, Pickup Truck, Gas and all the Beer.

Drive too fast

I drive way too fast to worry about my cholesterol.

Slim and Fat

How can a Slim Chance and a Fat Chance mean the same thing?

Turn Signals

If your car's Turn Signals were meant to go on when you started turning, they would be automatic. Even the car knows what you are doing after you do it. Try using them before you turn.

cool side

Am I the only one who loves flipping my pillow to the colder side?

Chicken Chunks

How many people think they actually take the bones out of boneless chicken wings?


Wouldn't it be nice if we could select which things we would actually be able to remember.


A woman can go to work, get groceries on the way back, then get home and clean house without uttering a word. A man on the other hand must ANNOUNCE to the world that he just put his dirty socks into the clothes hamper without being told to.

Not So Smart Car

If a SMART car and a real car were to collide, which one do you think would be the SMART choice to be in?

Campers that grow

Campers that used to be able to be pulled by Cars, now require a Truck. What will we use in the future...Tractors?

Square Peas

Someone could get rich -$$$- developing square Peas.

Alice Cooper

I can't get a girl, cuz I ain't got a car
I can't get a car, cuz I ain't got a job
I can't get a job, cuz I ain't got a car
So I'm looking for a girl with a job and a car

I can't go to school, cuz I ain't got a gun
I ain't got a gun, cuz I ain't got a job
I ain't got a job, cuz I can't go to school
So I'm looking for a girl with a gun and a job
~Alice Cooper

What To Do With An Old Trash Can

It is near impossible to get the Trash Man to take the OLD trash can away after you buy a new one.

M&M Sexes

Did you know there are male and female M&Ms? The ones with nuts have a M on them for male and the plain ones have W’s on them for women.

You can plan a strategy for your life, but you can't change what has happened along the way.

You can plan a strategy for your life, but you can't change what has happened along the way.


You only get 1 BirthDay, you do however get a lifetime of Annual Age Celebration Events.

Valentine Cards

Ever notice how the greeting card people have got you giving out Mother’s and Father’s Day cards to everyone, not just your own parents. Don’t even get me started on the kids at school who are required to hand out Valentine cards to everyone regardless of their sex.

efile Tax Forms

Why does it cost money to efile our tax forms, when it costs the government so much more to process a paper return?

Winter Trash

Spring is the time of year we get to see all the new Birds, Flowers and Winter Trash .

Free Bill Pay Service

The sign on the bank read’ Check Out Our Free Bill Pay Service”. Yet when I went inside they said they needed money first.


If a car was coming at you at night traveling at the speed of light, could you see the headlights?

time change

If the time change occurs at 2 AM and springs ahead 1 hour. What time do I set my alarm to wake up and change my clock?

Stop Shaky Cam!

Join Timmy in an effort to abolish the use of Shaky Cam in Movies, TV Shows and Videos.
Help Timmy Stop Shaky Cam!
Shaky Cam makes me sick! Why do Movies, TV shows and Videos need to shake and spin? They take a perfectly good show and then shake it all up while you are trying to watch it. Some argue that it has its place and shows creativity. They say it adds realism. I just say it makes me sick!


I have had to stop watching some really good shows just because the producers decided to make me nauseous. It isn’t fair that they do this to the picture. Maybe if the people who decide to do the Shaky Cam on a show knew that they were actually loosing viewers because of it, they may reconsider. After all, I am sure nobody would walk out of a show just because it didn’t shake.

I put this site together to give people like me who are sick and tired of the Shaky Cam technique a place to be heard. Please join me in voicing your opinion. Leave me a comment.

 Timmy's Sick List

  • Batman Begins
  • Bloodrayne 2
  • Bloody Sunday
  • Cannibal Holocaust
  • Cavite
  • Children of Men
  • Cloverfield
  • Deja Vu
  • Diary of the Dead
  • District 9
  • Domino
  • Felon
  • Friday Night Lights
  • Gamer
  • Hancock
  • Iron Man
  • Man on Fire
  • Never Back Down
  • Outlaw
  • Poor Boy's Game
  • Quantum of Solace
  • Quarentine
  • Rachel Getting Married
  • REC
  • Serenity
  • Terminator: Salvation
  • The Blair Witch Project
  • The Bourne Supremecy
  • The Bourne Ultimatum
  • The Counterfeiters
  • The Hurt Locker
  • The Kingdom
  • The Last Broadcast
  • The Last Exorcism
  • The Line
  • The Path to 9/11
  • The Rundown
  • The Signal
  • Transformers
  • United 93

  • 24
  • 30 Rock
  • Arrested Development
  • Battlestar Galactica
  • Fear
  • Firefly
  • Friday Night Lights
  • MI-5
  • Modern Family
  • NYPD Blue
  • Saving Grace
  • The Closer
  • The Office
  • The Shield
  • Traffic Light
Definition of Shaky Cam

From Wikipedia:

Shaky camera, shaky cam, handheld camera or free camera is a cinematographic technique where stable-image techniques are dispensed with on purpose. The camera is handheld, or given the appearance of being handheld, and shots are limited to what one photographer could have accomplished with one camera. Shaky cam gives a film sequence an ad-hoc, electronic news-gathering, or documentary film feel. It suggests unprepared, unrehearsed filming of reality, and can provide a sense of dynamics, immersion, instability or nervousness. The technique can be used to give a pseudo-documentary cinéma vérité appearance to a film.

Too much shaky camera motion can make the viewer feel dizzy or sick.



To all my friends, I truly hope you enjoy V. D.

Great Ringtone

I have such a great ringtone on my phone that I hate to interrupt it.


Why is the alphabet in that order? Is it because of that song?

Head for the Light

If you see the light head directly for it, unless of course you hear a train whistle.

Just toss that Ashtray out the car window

Why do people have a problem with dumping full ashtrays out the car window, but not with flicking thousands of butts out the window, one-by-one.

Parking Lights

If they are called "Parking Lights", then why do people drive with them on?